Frumpy Women in Church
Sunday (while I was paying careful attention to the sermon), I noticed a rather disturbing trend among women in the church. As I looked around the congregation, I noticed that most of the married women under 40 looked run down, untended, frumpy. I’ve been trying to figure out why women in the prime of their lives would let themselves turn into bag ladies. When I looked around, most of us hadn’t taken the time to style the hair or apply makeup. I’m okay with that, but the clothes! So many of the women in church looked in serious need of a shopping trip and a new wardrobe.
I think maybe that once a woman gets married she lets the pressures of life (home making, family, kids, work, cooking, cleaning, ministries, etc., etc., etc.) push out making an effort to look nice. I’m not saying that all those things aren’t important, but ladies, REALLY, if you want to keep your husband, give him something to look at. Make him proud to sit by you in church.
I’m not going to go any farther into supposing the whys of it, but my distraction in church has pushed me into spending a bit more money and time on myself. I’m worth it, but more to the point, Brenton’s worth it.
Tags: Personal Development
September 7th, 2007 at 7:30 pm
Reading over my shoulder, Kelsey had to ask and make sure that you were a woman. After I assured her that yes, it’s Sunny, not Sonny, she told me that men aren’t allowed to call women frumpy and it would be “revolting.” I’m not sure I really understand this. Some women are just empirically frumpy, whether I’m a man or a woman. I guess the lesson I should take from this is to just keep my mouth shut.
September 9th, 2007 at 10:03 pm
Since I am over 40 years old, obviously I was not included in your observations!! Plus I had on my new twirly dress!!!
September 9th, 2007 at 10:04 pm
Brenton is lucky to have a Naturally beautiful Sunny!! Love you! *Muah*
September 10th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
Delurking here …
Okay, so I totally agree with you and while I fit in the socio-economic category you describe, I was wearing my nice Ann Taylor Loft outfit to church yesterday. Even with nursery duty.
So this is one of those things that 10 years from now you will look back in chuckle. After a week of cleaning up toys and vomit and attempting to make nutritious meals they probably didn’t have much time for that much needed shopping trip. And the post-baby figure is sometimes too depressing to shop for. And on some Sunday mornings, it’s all you can do to get yourself dressed and get your screaming toddlers to church almost on time in clean clothes. Somehow mascara gets lost in the need to search for small shoes and socks and sippy cups.
So keep watching What-Not-To-Wear for inspiration but in the mean time, volunteer to help with the nursery or Sunday School, and don’t judge them too much before you’ve walked in their shoes. (Even if they are ugly shoes).
September 10th, 2007 at 7:28 pm
I’ve been thinking more about this. I did come off a bit too strong, and I don’t think that I got my point across effectively. There is a lot to being a mom that I don’t understand. I will fully admit that. These were not all moms. Many were married women without kids.
I think part of it is a problem with the church condemning women for their sexuality. While I don’t think that we should venture towards the flaunting, everything out there for the world to see brand of femininity that the world has to offer, there has to be a balance between hiding our God-given beauty and offering it up for the whole world.
At the same time, I don’t think that beauty comes in a bottle. I don’t even think that makeup is necessary. These women looked like they didn’t care anymore and hadn’t cared in a while. Quite frankly, they deserve better than that. Maybe it’s a self-esteem issue, maybe it’s the constant message to hide your beauty, maybe they are tired. I don’t know.
September 11th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting, but the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. NIV These are words to be taken to heart, however this same woman, in verse 22, clothes herself in “fine linen and purple”.
I’m well over 40 now and I’ve raised 3 children, with all that entails. It’s not easy (it’s impossible) to look great all the time. Much of my “frumpishness” at times came from exhaustion, lack of time, lack of resources, etc. Some of it came from low self-esteem which turned into frumpishness which compounded low self-esteem… In more recent times I have dealt with the issues of the past which were leading to this cycle. I am seeing myself in a new light. I love the Lord, who loves me very much. I’m seeing that more every day. And I’m working on the wardrobe of “fine linen and purple”.